April 28th – Verdict is in

Dear me,

It now appears that Step 1 of the Abundance Project will be complete by the middle of May, AND the appraisal came in at the EXACT minimum needed to make a refinance of the 2nd loan possible too (that will be Step 2) PHEW!

THANK YOU to all universal energies as well as friends and family who helped me focus and set this intention. I am grateful to all and also thrilled that I never let any IMG(MF!) get hold of me and create anxiety/fear and sleepless nights. She still tries to do stuff – like when the appraisal arrived today she wanted to start paying a bunch of stuff from savings but NO! We wait! Because until this loan closes and we know FOR SURE how much needs to come from my pocket, we DO NOT TOUCH the savings account! Those folks can wait for 2 more weeks. Little Miss Overly Optimistic Cheerleader can just sit right back down and relax. I’m in charge here now 🙂

It’s been interesting watching for appearances by my IMG personalities. A situation has been brewing when I normally would have had a major attack of insecurity. The attempts to keep me from communicating in a touchy situation have been there..but they are weaker. I’m seeing them before I feel compelled to act and recognizing it for what it is and just shaking her off and continuing to keep lines open. Again, not letting the Inner Critic take over. She’s not gone, I’ve just asked her gently to take a seat and it seems to be working.

I did start the day making my statement of loving intention and…I had a couple of instances when it popped into my head as my first reaction to one or two people was to kind of stiffen up and get into “walls up” mode….so I am VERY glad I had that to refer back to in my mind and “breathe in, breathe out” and open up to what was needed from me. Which, in every case, was something I could VERY easily provide and it was frankly amusing to me afterwards that I felt any resistance at all.

Old habits die hard, but some of them shall die no matter what because they are serving no one, especially not me!

Be kind, be loving, just be.

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