It’s kind of cool to watch the day unfold, see something come up, realize that just a few months ago I would have reacted a certain way that had a 50/50 chance of stirring up a tense situation or at least some self doubt over said reaction, and then choose an entirely different path after careful contemplation. Or, perhaps choose the same path but do so with confidence.
Today I was presented with two conversations that could easily have devolved into a salacious gossipy overtone.Yet neither one did. In one case I did carefully choose my words to avoid pulling it down and I noticed the person I was talking to match me in that manner (she isn’t the type to gossip anyway, but there was some low hanging fruit out there if you know what I mean). In the other conversation, I just didn’t participate other than to nod and say “I know” or “yup” now and then – just let the other person talk and without me feeding into it, the subject changed really quickly. Phew!
(The main computer system was down all day so there were more than the normal opportunities to stand around and chat)
I’ve pondered this topic and while I would not name gossip as something I’ve done a ton, I also haven’t avoided it, right? In fact I *can* think of a couple of times in the last few years (with one person in particular) when I actively contributed to talking about someone in a very unkind manner passing judgment left, right. up and down her life. Just thinking about it now leaves a bad taste in my mouth!
No more of that.
Of course, I always did it merely in an attempt to get the other person in the conversation to like me.
Ah, so sad!
No more of that either!
I am grateful that the Headspace app has a series on Relationships that focuses on expanding empathy and compassion to replace tendencies towards judgment. I know it’s helped to cement these improved thought patterns.
Be kind, be loving, just be.