Dear me – and another thing….you know what you are doing right now, right?
You are finding yourself pulled back to 1983. Look at all the things you are suddenly drawn towards. (Well, with the exception of the running and this writing thing which you would NEVER have considered back then!)The dancing, the self help/metaphysical exploration, the focus on making friends…even the expansion of your accounting skills. This is you taking a leap back in time. Because that break you had to take is pretty much over isn’t it?
You had this idea in your head when you graduated from high school – mind you, it was nebulous at best – but still….you were on the precipice of adult hood looking to find your way. You got the idea from a then boyfriend that accounting/finance was the way to go for you and things kinda started to fall into place. You figured you would continue your dancing – focusing on tap primarily since it brought you the most joy, and you also figured you would travel and explore different ideas/beliefs. You’d spent almost your entire senior year of high school in the metaphysical/occult section of the local bookstore near campus and devoured everything you could. Astrology, Chinese and traditional, numerology, you name it, you read about it and dived head first into it. There were strings of numbers in every notebook you had as you tried out different compatibilities from the various methods. The point is, you were open and curious and totally into expanding your mind and beliefs.
And then…well..life happened and instead of launching out on your own into a lucrative career in finance…you had a child and sort of husband. And another husband and another child. And thus began a 30 year journey on an entirely different path. Primarily it was about being a single mother (something you surely never planned on). It was, of course, the BEST possible divergence! However, you didn’t forget that young lady you left behind the fall of 1984 did you? So now here we are, older and wiser with the chance to revisit those dreams. When you are tapping into the abundance of the Universe in a way that provides you (and your family) all that is needed to be safe and secure as well as allow yourself to do the things that 18 year old you wanted to do. It’s even better though! Because you did discover running and eating healthy and even this writing thing which helps your mind to focus on your dreams with ever more clarity and conviction.
Recognizing what is going on here, now I (the older version) need to chip away at those little areas of resistance/doubt/cynicism brought on by those 30 years of living. Drop the judgement, embrace the sense of wonder and innocence. No limitations, only endless possibilities. Some that can be made to happen now on your own, some that will take a little longer with the help of others, some big ones that will take the boundless energy of the Universe.
So take my hand 18 year old me. Let’s get this done!
My refinance WILL be approved this month.
Nick WILL get a job this month.
My parents WILL get $500 more per month beginning in March.